2008 Top 10 Worst Make Money Online Sites

Posted on December 22nd, 2008 in Affiliate Marketing, Retards

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Having had to wade through another year of god-awful “Top 10 Best” diggbait style posts, Nickycakes has yet again compiled a Top 10 WORST Make money online sites list.  If you didn’t catch last years post, chiggity check it.

Anyway, here’s the list…worst of the worst, 08:

10. Ms. Daniellems-danielle

Talk about exploiting the fact that you’re female as your only angle on getting readers.  Do you honestly think if the internet marketing crowd weren’t sex-starved parents basement dwelling nerds that you’d have made it over 100 subscribers?  Doubtful.  When you take time out of your day to make a post about a picture with you and Zac Johnson standing in front of the least unique and most overpriced waste of blog design services (unique blog designs..lol) you know your make money online blog is grasping at straws.  It’s cool though, you’ll probably get some drooling acne faced digital point reading college kid to sign up under your adbrite referral link and make you millions!  Till then, pack up shop and find a dayjob, or considering ebaying your used undergarments.  Nickycakes hears that does well with the same sorta crowd.

9. Zac Johnson - Secret Life of a Super Affiliatezac-johnson

If pretending you know about PPC and dressing up as Spiderman and going to childrens playgrounds in the daytime makes you a “super affiliate” then yes, Zac, you are Thuper…err Super..indeed!  To be fair, Zac’s blog started out ok.  He had some good tips at the beginning on how affiliate marketing worked, a few clever ideas, whatever.  And then about a year ago, it all went to crap.  Maybe he paid content writers to write his first few blog posts, and then when those articles ran out he had nothing to write for himself, who knows.  But it soon became clear that Zac had no idea about PPC.  The dude made some decent money back when Yahoo screwed up with their adsense style program and was paying people tons more than they should of per click, but after that dried up and zac’s network of myspace layout sites (lol) got flushed down the toilet, the dude had nothing.  He stuttered his way through an agonizing session at Affiliate Summit where he proved he knew absolutely nothing about PPC, and then he was caught ripping off an affiliates landing page word for word right after publishing a guide on how to make landing pages, and was trying to claim he was some kind of expert on the subject.  He’s now resorted to devoting entire posts to things like figuring out how to calculate how much money you make per hour….daily revenue / 24….you’re a genius zac…really.  This dead horse has been beaten into the ground, time to remove from your rss reader.

8.  SeoBlackhat.com

seo-black-hat

Back in early 2007, this blog/forum had a little credibility.  No longer.  The dude who runs it, Quesadilla, Godzilla, something like that, has turned into the blackhat version of shoemoney, teaming up with the most blatant retards like Marcus “i think making $1k a month cookie stuffing ebay makes me a blackhat allstar” Tandler to try and convince newbies to attend their $5k attendance fee seo gatherings.  Really? Seoktoberfest?  Nickycakes feels really sorry for whoever shelled out $5k to go hang out with this group of asshats instead of spending that money on something….significantly less lame.  Having seen pics of said event, you would have been embarassed to be caught dead at this thing.  Either way, total scam, this dude’s fallen off bigtime, and it shows.  Keep making posts nitpicking the no-follow tactics of news sites like forbes.com big guy…everyone cares..really they do.

7. TylerCruz.com

tyler-cruz

The first giant douchebag make money online blogger was obviously shoemoney.  Then someone who wanted to be like him, copied everything he did.  His name is john chow.  Then uberaffiliate copied john chow, and people copied uber, all the way down the line till you get to TylerCruz.com.  Same deal.   No good content, tons of worthless posts and contests with the hope that some whale affiliate will accidentally click his link to sign up to marketleverage, or whatever flavor of the month worthless network is sending bloggers free stuff this week, and make him $500 per month to pay for his inevitably unused gym membership and a lifetime supply of little debbies and mt dew.  Listen, bro, if you’re going to be a sheep and get one of those oh-so-gay caricatures drawn up as your blog logo, at least get one that doesn’t look 3 times as skinny as you are.  Really dude, it looks like you ate the guy in your logo.  Be realistic.

6. Daniel Kemp - One Man, One Dreamdaniel-kemp

Ok, so this guy looks like Napoleon Dynamite, and decides to take the hype that surrounded that movie and move it over into the internet marketing realm by pretending to be this really weird guy.  He frequents wickedfire forums where he prentends to be really weird, and makes these videos and really long “intellectual” posts complete with footnotes.  People do actually fall for it and it’s sometimes hard to decide who is more idiotic, kemp himself, or the people who don’t realize it’s a big show.  Really the only reason this guy is on this list is because he posts on wickedfire a lot…the blog isn’t exactly make money online related…

5.  Blackhat World

blackhat-world

Do your biggest dreams in life involve making a few hundred dollars a day by pretending to be a girl, visiting chat rooms, and persuading horny guys to sign up to dating services under your affiliate link?  Then this forum is full of people just like you.  Sign up today.  (bhw will likely start some gay thread about this post, and then make a short rally for someone to get some russians to ddos nickycakes’ uber shared hosting acct before giving up like they give up on pretty much everything in life)

4.  Mr Javomr-javo

Have you ever had a nightmare where there was this guy who barely spoke english and kept sending you im’s every day asking you to read their awful blog posts and to submit them to digg and get your friends to read them…EVERY….DAY.   Well Mr. Javo has made that nightmare a reality.  There is probably no other blog on the internet that has so many words on it that mean so little.  When this guy first started, he contacted as many people as he could and just bugged the living crap out of them until they agreed to digg or sphinn his blog posts or subscribe to his rss feed.  He does a “blog revenue” post every month where he includes the amount of money he made total in his affiliate marketing ventures, and it’s always less than $500, yet he has written an e-book on getting started with affiliate marketing.  In addition, he has the most annoying to look at caricature blog logo ever drawn.  Gives nickycakes a headache just thinking about this guy.

3.  Digital Point Forumsdigital-point

No surprise, digital point forums makes the list yet again.  Nickycakes was attempting to not repeat any of the “winners” from last year, but really, its hard to imagine digital point could have actually gotten worse since last year, but it definately has.  The place is just a cesspool of 3rd world scammers trying to make a few dollars a month clicking their own adsense ads.  It’s really impossible to describe, and the Cakes is probably preaching to the choir here, but if you’re part of the 1% of the readers who have not been there before, you really have to see it for yourself.  Make your way to the google adsense section on a rainy sunday weekend for more laughs than you can handle.

2.  Banner Blindnessbanner-blindness

For someone who’s been in the industry for a couple years, this guy’s pathetic attempts at viral marketing would be comical if they weren’t so damn sad.  He’s another one of those john chow ripoff clones, but can’t even seem to pull that off properly.   His latest genius viral marketing plan was to hire some average looking model to dress in wrapping paper, rattle off the names of like 50 affiliate networks and make money online blogs before unwrapping herself on camera.  Well, she was clothed in a bikini underneath, and he advertised it as her getting completely naked, strike 1.  The dude obviously shelled out a ton of money for this ultimately boring ordeal, strike 2.  And he got really upset when everyone called him a failure and demanded backlinks from people for his troubles, strike 3.  Here are some simple tips to fix your blog, guy:  Get a theme that doesn’t blind people….bright pink and blue? MOAR LIKE COLORBLINDNESS.COM!  If you insist on tagging most of your posts with 100+ categories, don’t have wordpress list every category on your sidebar so that it extends about 10 times further down the page than your site content does.  Actually…the best tip to fix your blog is just quit the internet man.  Just give up.

1.  Escobar Statusescobar-status

Words do not do justice.

Keep it real.

Published by nickycakes

96 Responses to “2008 Top 10 Worst Make Money Online Sites”

  1. Chad Says:

    Haha @ Escobar Status. Mmm, make money online.

  2. zero1two Says:

    escobarstatus4life recognize.

  3. Rage9 Says:

    Lol, Kemp made the list!

  4. Think Like An SOB Says:

    saving Eagle for top 10 best? lol

  5. d03boy Says:

    i suck more than all these combined

  6. radiowf Says:

    bannerblindness finally got his backlink.

  7. Leo Says:

    As always, you are the pimp juice…very funny….maybe you should do a top 100 worst blogs on there (I nominate myself)

  8. The Net Fool Says:

    Well I guess I know who to be nice to now, haha. Great list… seriously… takes some guts to put this out. I gotta step up my game to stay out of this mess! Keep up the solid work Nicky

  9. PPC.bz Says:

    This is an injustice and an outrage that ppc.bz is not featured on this list.

  10. Shark SEO Says:

    I’d not seen BannerBlindness til I read this, but I remember the thread where he got banned from WF. Just checked out his blog and noticed this:

    “Let Wickedfire users keep their forum, their community, and their non-productive ways. Good riddance, I did learn a lot, but it’s time for me to move on..”

    And then literally ONE day later:

    “12/20/08 - Update
    Banner Blindness has joined Wickedfire again.”

    At least the guy doesn’t fail to fail.

  11. Eric Says:

    Funny shit for sure. I’ve heard about some of these peeps but subscribe to zero of them. Just the Cakes for now.

  12. bennytejeda Says:

    LOL love your sense of humor. Hey Nick, try putting my blog next year, maybe I’ll get some traffic to my site

  13. Anthony Says:

    I like the post. Here is another guy showing us how to make even more online. This guy is showing me the ropes and it hasn’t cost me anything. It is free. Sign up and watch the cool video where he logs into his account and shows us how much he makes. http://www.partnerwithpaul.com/go/18920

  14. Melvin Says:

    LOL… this list is insanely funny and makes sense! I missed this top 10 but anyway I think I’ll make it next year.. ;-)

  15. Zac Johnson Says:

    i HATE you nicholas.

  16. underworld Says:

    pretty comprehensive list there

    “Have you ever had a nightmare where there was this guy who barely spoke english and kept sending you im’s every day asking you to read their awful blog posts and to submit them to digg and get your friends to read them…EVERY….DAY. Well Mr. Javo has made that nightmare a reality.”

    Mr Javo, the man the legend.

  17. Mr Javo Says:

    Hahaha thank you very much man!

  18. Matthew Berman Says:

    damn that’s some serious hate for zac johnson lol.

  19. roosterbob Says:

    Yall might be laughing now, but escobarstatus.com is rolling in some serious dough.

  20. Kris Says:

    LOL @ spidermans comment. You should have paid for the Carmen Electra autograph instead of hulk hogans… Might have saved you. Mmmmmmmm nevermind your past the saving point.

  21. Roy Says:

    Many of these are well deserved. Yes, Escobar Status takes the cake.
    Not sure I agree with having Zach Johnson on the list. Which Landing Page did he “rip off”.

    Though funny to read about doing the right thing coming from a “reformed” blackhat.

    Happy Holidays!

  22. nickycakes Says:

    http://www.nickycakes.com/super-affiliate-zac-johnson-steals-landing-pages-from-newbies/

  23. Chris Says:

    I could have sworn John Chow would be #1 for 2 years in a row

  24. rocknblogger Says:

    Okay that last one at #10 has got to be the bumbest human being on the face of the earth. I’m actually amazed that he manged to even st up that umm umm umm I don’t even know what to call it… umm page?

    Wow they’ll give anyone a domain these days. But really shouldn’t you have to pass a stupid test? Plus can you tell me where I can sign up for the intranet cuz I really don’t want to miss out on the “fade”.

    Let me stop. Thanks for the list, great stuff.

  25. rocknblogger Says:

    Sorry I meant number one, I was laughing so hard I had tears in my eyes:D

  26. Gaaaaa Says:

    Liar, Dp doesn’t make you laugh, it makes you cry.

    Well this one made me smile a bit:
    “I had a lovely suprise when I logged into my Adsense this morning! One of my channels showed 100% CTR!”

  27. maffs Says:

    Why pick on Escobar surely he can’t be making any money from that site. It’s appalling.

    And as for Kemp he’s always good for a laugh. Leave him be. Although he’ll probably enjoy the notoriety.

  28. yaph Says:

    Escobar Status looks like a great satire. It just cannot be meant serious.

  29. Clint Lenard Says:

    Wow@a grown man wearing a costume in a kids park…

    I’m not one to judge, but I’m not sure that costume would keep him from getting thrown in jail and raped.

    It’s hard to even laugh at it. It’s more than a little strange.

  30. deStone Says:

    a lil harsh on blackhat world there — gonna get your ass own3d fucking with the dark side.

  31. Alex Says:

    Most people don’t believe it but 4 years ago I WAS POOR! That’s right - poor. Now I have a website and I joined a WEB RING!

  32. Hey Says:

    It’s started already Nicky!

    http://www.blackhatworld.com/blackhat-seo/black-hat-seo/42804-nickycakes-com-slamming-bhw-wtf.html

  33. nickycakes Says:

    looks like whatever thread that was got removed… not surprised that harro would remove posts from people badmouthing his gay forum

  34. ethan Says:

    Surprised that Franklin Bishop the Blog Expert wasn’t on the list…

  35. CMS Says:

    This is the funniest fucking thing I’ve read in a month.

  36. CMS Says:

    Nevermind, make that the funniest thing I’ve read all year. Keep up the good work, new subscriber.

  37. Biztone Says:

    Monthly internet bill $35
    Hosting bill $30
    Monthly power bill $48

    Calling shitty websites out like this…
    PRICELESS!

    Nice work.

  38. Hannah Says:

    I can’t imagine starting a blog aimed at nerds based on the fact that I’m female. It’s like asking to be raped at an affiliate summit.

    Hell even in #cakes I occasionally get some creepos PMing me when I join the channel trying to get with me entirely based on the fact that my name is Hannah.

  39. ben Says:

    care to share why you should not be part of that list?

  40. Off-White Hat Says:

    2009 will be my year to make it onto this list.

  41. TheOne Says:

    I think your just pissed because all the forums probably banned your stupid ass. Theres nothing wrong with the site, just dumbasses that dont know how to use them or the methods.

  42. NickyFuckFace Says:

    you’re fucking joke dude … that’s what you are, you criticize everyone and still you’re a fucking disgrace …

    I think #1 for worst make money online website is yours - fuck face … dumb under aged high school kid

  43. bhatter Says:

    hmm interesting. but there is a site missing from the list

    http://www.nickycakes.com should be up there as a contender to dont you think?

  44. o_O Says:

    I can’t see this website on the list wth ?

  45. asdfasdf Says:

    You are a fucking dumbass.

    Probably the biggest fag i’ve ever seen, moderating your gay ass WickedFire, (which should be #1 on your list),

    …Honestly, do you guys just log onto the forum to say “fuck/ass/shit/retard” for hours at a time??

    Will THIS post help you get more link juice??… Wait til you get a Trojan Stuffed in that fucking forum…

  46. deStone Says:

    OMFG - I got banned from BHW - WTF

  47. Julien Says:

    The Cakes is funky, for sure…

  48. Timon Weller Says:

    love the list nicky cakes.. lmao.. brilliant…

  49. Mitch Says:

    At least Ms. Danielle is one of the cutest things I’ve seen online in awhile. I’ll admit that I subscribe to a couple of these, but only because one needs to see what others are possibly writing about, sometimes for fodder for your own blog. Good writing here.

  50. AffiliateCrack Says:

    @ To all whom it may concern:

    Call me crazy, but I don’t think it would be a very good business model if he included himself in this list.

  51. Travis Stark Says:

    Wow, there’s a lot of silly stuff out there. This is an awesome top ten list, you should post this to my buddy’s site http://www.toptentopten.com/ and you can link back to your site. They are looking for content and in return provide a user base that can track back to your site. The coolest feature is you can let other people vote on the rankings of your list.

  52. Ryan @ Linkbuildr Says:

    Well this should keep me entertained for a while :)

  53. Jonathan Volk Says:

    Number 11. Ryan Eagle? I was surprised he didn’t make the list. Hahaha.

    And Woo, didn’t make the list this year, but… maybe next year? Lol

  54. rgordon83 Says:

    lmao @ this post. And especially LMAO at “NickyFuckFace” comment (#42), damn that dude is bitter about something…

  55. Hannah Says:

    LOL @ angry BHWers

  56. Paintless Says:

    I used to subs to seo bh and there was some decent info there, but all in all, not much help, and quads didnt keep fresh content. lets face it..pro BH’rs ARENT going to share what they do..they MIGHT tell you a crash and burn technique when a new algo squashes their game, but at that point, its useless info…
    And Cakes..you only scratched the tip of the iceberg with the “winners”…there are SOOO many more posers in this business..god knows why they blog…

  57. Billy Says:

    lol escobarstatus - that may be even better than makemonies.

  58. Chris De La Rosa Says:

    Solid as usual.

  59. Trisha Lyn Fawver Says:

    I’m surprised you’re not a fan of Zac Johnson; I usually find good info on his blog. Regardless, I tend to agree on your other choices. Good list.

  60. wigger mcgavin Says:

    lol funny shit…

  61. Amit Says:

    This is really funny as hell.
    Merry Christmas Nicky.

  62. Haha Says:

    Why the hell isn’t this website up there? Should take #1 probably.

  63. Online Jobs Says:

    Thats spiderman He came to save us or play,
    thanks man for notifying about this,

  64. CJ Says:

    Your comments about Zac Johnson and Tyler Cruz are right on! I suffered through Zac’s agonizing panel at the AF Social Media conference, and wanted to slit my wrists. As for Tyler, I can’t wait to read his monthly revenue update next month, now that MarketLeverage has pulled their contest! :)

  65. ISDF Says:

    They need to do way instain nicky> who kill their babbys who cannot frigth back…

  66. ms danielle Says:

    lol. only people who don’t read my blog would ever call it a make money blog. thanks for the link though!

  67. JD Says:

    Escobar = BWAHAHA!

    Guru indeed

  68. Yung Drew Says:

    Absolutely hilarious list. ESCOBAR STATUS = G.O.A.T. $$$ Blog.

  69. daniel Says:

    You are incredibly stupid, all these blatant remarks at trying to make a decent log site? It must be hard to do that when you’re IQ is below 50. You don’t even know what you’re talking about in half of these and all you can do is insult their image. Not what they can actually do, and as for BHW being full of pedos & idiots etc, go re read some topics of kind people who share their OPINIONS, just like you’re doing. So I guess you should slap yourself at the top of your next arrogant “top 10 idiots of the web” list.

  70. Chris Says:

    Cakes, A little wrong with your Seo Blackhat claims. The private forum is good resource and your buddy Smaxor is a member, so it cant be half bad no?

  71. Harry Says:

    Darkseoprogramming will subscribe to all these. Now I can make moonies foreva.

  72. Beerhat Says:

    Thanks for a good laugh Nicky.

  73. Louis Says:

    Escobarstatus, hilarious.

    He says: “Most people don’t believe it but 4 years ago I WAS POOR! That’s right - poor. Now I have a website and I joined a WEB RING!”

    I have no doubt that he was poor 4 years ago and I have no doubt he’s still poor. With so many typos and bad design, that site has to be a joke.

  74. David Hobson Says:

    Great post i really enjoyed it. Cant understand how that Mr Chow has not made the list everytime i read his blog i read about what he had for tea last night.

  75. Edgar Says:

    What a list, first time here on nickycakes

  76. Don Mega Says:

    Cakes, you had me laughing with tears in my eyes with this one. uncontrollable laughter with the DP review. It’s true though, I have so many visitors from 3rd world countries to my blog because I posted a link to my site in the sig on DP now I have these scammers “snooping” through my site.

    You forgot to write about the people buying ebooks after ebooks on there paying for the same rehashed info. Im serious you could sell an ebook on there on how to make your fish talk and you will have people IMing you for a review copy.

    HILARIOUS

  77. Chris M Says:

    I lolled so hard when I read this!

  78. Ben Moreno Says:

    I found this post by typing, “top make money blogs” in Google and it came up in the first results. Congrats!

    Very brave indeed to post this kind of stuff. You just gained another subscriber. Cheers!

  79. Mr. Meoff Says:

    Let’s not forget the other type of person on Digital Point: The Google spy.

  80. Jeremy Hermanns Says:

    Great Post!

    Now that we know the Top 10 worst, can you let us know what you would consider the best resources?

    I really would like to know who you value and where I should devote my attention to.

    Best,
    Jeremy

  81. Skrilla Says:

    Ha, Daniel Kemp at #6? I didn’t even know the earth emperor had a blog.

  82. monkeyman Says:

    BannerBlindness.com is offering some services to you Nickycakes. See for yourself

    h t t p://www.bannerblindness.com/banner-blindness-top-referring-source-of-traffic-last-30-days/

    LOL

  83. Debt Slaying Says:

    Ha Ha great list. DP forums has been crap for years.

    I hate those stupid caricatures that are showing up in blog headers all over the place as well.

    This is my first time visting your site and you got me hooked. Subscribing. :)

    Thanks

  84. Brad Blogging.com - Personal Blog Tips And Blog Help Says:

    Love the thing about Tyler Cruz and the logo bit. :D

  85. BHW Says:

    Blackhatworld, btw, is much more than just an ewhoring…. In fact, ewhoring is only one of many methods discussed at bhw.
    BHW also is not just about black hat methods.
    BHW is in my Top 10 money making sites.

  86. jesse grant Says:

    Lol nickycakes doesnt leave my post , i should blog about this

  87. nickycakes Says:

    what the fuck are you talking about, your comment is still there. scroll up retard

  88. Jessi Says:

    LMFAO I’m dying. And #1 can’t be real. No way. The very first site I built 12 years ago looked a million times better than this. Good Jesus.

  89. Bbabba Says:

    Believe it or not, Google advised me to subscribe to this blog when I was reading stuff in my Google reader.

    I clicked this post, read the whole post and was laughing out loud while reading.

  90. Nota Bene Consulting Says:

    Nothing to say that has not already been said. Cakes…you are a legend!

    One of the funniest posts on the net :)

    Thanks

  91. Jeff Paul Internet Business Says:

    Internet marketing is a really rocket science for non IT geeks. For those who are really an IT freak it’s just a matter of hard work and research.

  92. Amazing New Secret Says:

    Erik Zapsa from Black Hat World. One of the best ways to get traffic from internet marketers is to insult them.

    The article is well written and funny as shit.

    Well Done Sir.

  93. Internet Marketing Says:

    DP is such a horrible place to sell, i agree.

    However, there is a benefit. Yes, it is a place of 3rd world scammers without money…i got scammed there LOTS, and the beggars there make me throw up.

    But for outsourcing and finding someone doing some cheap work its excellent :)

    g.

  94. Bethany Says:

    Black hat world sucks, my boyfriends always on there. Agreee with other post. 99% of the stuff there is stuff like posing as a women in the “horny” forums or on craigslist, lead guys on, and pray you get sign ups.. So lame.

  95. Patrick Says:

    your crazy to bash on BHW - I guess its because your a whitehat fruitcake

  96. nickycakes Says:

    Sorry but “blackhat seo” has nothing to do with “blackhat” anything. Not only are you all at BHW fruitcakes, but you’re broke fruitcakes. Have fun with your mafia wars blog, i’m sure that’ll make you rich.

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